My kids are always perfectly dressed, they never misbehave, they always pick their underpants off of the bathroom floor and they never fight. I too am always perfectly dressed with trendy clothing that's artfully styled, my house is always spotless and decorated for each holiday/season, I work out for an hour each day, I make my family paleo meals every night, I give 110% to my church calling, I volunteer in my children's classes at school and my car is well maintained with the interior impeccably cleaned.
Just this morning, my older kids were fighting like maniacs before they left for school, I had to clean underpants up off the bathroom floor after tripping over my son's instrument he left in the middle of the hallway. I usually take my kids to school in my pajamas- no make up, no hair do, no bra. Right now I am sitting here in my sweats with my hair wet and hanging in my face (at least I've showered before noon which is rare). My youngest is downstairs watching tv, eating a ham and cheese sandwich with no fruits or veggies of any kinds because the apples I gave him were "icky." I can't remember the last time I worked out, other than lugging the vacuum or laundry up and down the stairs and I think a small animal could live off of crumbs on the floor in my van, which by the way has terribly squeaky brakes.
I know you don't come to this blog (the few of you who do come here, I totally appreciate and love you!!) to read deep thoughts by me. First of all, I'm not a great writer (that is what it is) and most of the time I would rather post fun projects and other ideas, not in-depth knitty gritty life stuff. But I've been thinking a lot about mothering and woman hood. Probably because there have been quite a few articles in the media lately about judging others. Like this one to the mom on the Iphone. Then I read a different post about the holidays being totally out of hand and a friend on facebook went on a tirade about all the guilt she feels because she's not one of "those moms" who likes to do holiday craft projects and make homemade valentine's etc. Also, a friend at church made a comment about how alone and judged she feels at times. So because of all of this, there are a few things I want to say.
I am by far not someone who has it all together. For the most part, I embrace my imperfections. We are all in different seasons in our lives. Mine right now is being a stay at home mom. My older kids are in school but I still have a little guy at home. Being a mom is HARD! It's exhausting. Being home all day, entertaining and taking care of my little one is hard. Then carting my big kids around, dealing with attitudes and emotions, working on projects, taking them to their practices, etc is hard too!! Most of the time I feel stretched in so many different directions. I know I can not do it all. So I have to prioritize.
I insist that we have family dinner together every night. It takes juggling to get us all here at the same time and we stop for take out or go out for dinner often, which is something I'm working on. My goal is to cook more meals then we eat out. The most important thing to me is that we eat together!
I like to decorate for holidays and do fun themed craft projects so I usually try celebrate most holidays. And that's not because I feel pressured, I do it because I enjoy it! That being said, if we are too busy and don't put up St Patricks Day decor, it's ok. My kids liked the Lucky Charms, the shamrock straw glasses and green sugar cookies(that I bought the night before) just fine.
As I said before, I don't work out formally. I do a small routine (sit ups, plank, push ups) occasionally, but for the most part my exercise is from vacuuming, playing tag with my kids, riding scooters, sweeping and doing laundry. Someday I will take the time to go to Zumba at the gym. But it's just not a priority for me right now. If it is a priority for you, then great job! Way to take care of yourself!!
The main point I'm trying to say is that we need to prioritize our time- figure out the things that are most important and do them. Then let go of the guilt for not doing things that aren't as important to us. We also should not judge others because their priorities are different than ours. Let's grant ourselves grace that we are doing our very best. Because then we can extend that grace to others and give them the benefit of the doubt that they are doing their best too!